Why is being in the moment so hard? Because it’s uncomfortable Because it’s unpleasant Because we could mess it all up Because it’s not what we want Because it reopens old wounds Because we know it won’t last Because it can never be repeated Because it might never feel this way again Because it could […]
Category Archives: Young Men
Let go. When you feel someone “should” be acting in a certain way… Let go. When life isn’t working out the way you’ve planned… Let go. When you start to worry, obsess, or panic… Let go. When you want to control… Let go. When you are filled with grief about your past… Let go. When […]
A commonly unspoken feeling in family life is, “Do I matter to you?” It might sound strange that people sharing a home and a last name could question that of each other, but in the work I do, I see this question all the time implied, without being explicitly asked. I’ll give you an example. […]
Why is listening so hard? Because it means we will hear things we don’t agree with. Because we will fight the impulse to share the “correct point of view.” Because we want to fix it for the other rather than share in their emotion. Because we can’t let them get away with that. Because we […]
I find myself almost daily falling deeper in love with life. It’s a little odd for me to say that I’m in love with life because I know that I still feel pain. The holidays were once effortlessly happy, and I never understood why people moped around saying, “The holidays are tough.” Yet in the […]
When we are born into our families, we are essentially given a template for attachment. We learn that our needs will be met consistently and lovingly, thus creating secure attachment. Or, we learn that attachment is inconsistent and unreliable, creating insecure attachment patterns. We bring this template with us throughout our lives, particularly in our […]
Isvara pranidhana is the yogic practice of surrendering to something higher. I can’t think of any other practice that reminds me how small I am and how important I am, all at once. The art of surrendering acknowledges how little we have control over in this life. We can try to outsmart, outmaneuver, cajole, […]
“Nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know.” -Pema Chodron Pema Chodron’s words mean something new to me today than they did when I first read them several months ago. The lesson I’m currently being taught by my life’s circumstance is the need for compassion and forgiveness. When I […]
Relationships are an interesting balancing act. Between any two people, there’s a dynamic exchange at play. We give, we receive, we interpret meaning, we push each other (hopefully into growth), and ultimately we learn more about ourselves in the process. The best relationships I’ve been in are those with a mutual level of care and […]
One of my teachers recently posited the question, “What would the wisest or most caring being that you know want for you?” When I think of the people who love me the most, I know all they want is my happiness. When I search inside myself, I recognize all I want is my happiness too! […]