Tag Archives: awareness

Do I Matter to You?

A commonly unspoken feeling in family life is, “Do I matter to you?” It might sound strange that people sharing a home and a last name could question that of each other, but in the work I do, I see this question all the time implied, without being explicitly asked. I’ll give you an example. […]

Listening Deeply

Why is listening so hard? Because it means we will hear things we don’t agree with. Because we will fight the impulse to share the “correct point of view.” Because we want to fix it for the other rather than share in their emotion. Because we can’t let them get away with that. Because we […]

Secure Attachment Can Be Learned

When we are born into our families, we are essentially given a template for attachment. We learn that our needs will be met consistently and lovingly, thus creating secure attachment. Or, we learn that attachment is inconsistent and unreliable, creating insecure attachment patterns. We bring this template with us throughout our lives, particularly in our […]

Book Review: Reconciliation, Healing the Inner Child

Thich Nhat Hanh uses mindfulness and meditation as tools to apply to childhood wounds. His voice is ever calm and compassionate, creating a safe space for the reader to look at their pain without judgment or shame. He addresses the child inside all of us and asks to pay loving attention to the child within. […]